*Where my gray hairs out number thoughts in my head
*Where my facial features have slowing come to meet my chin, leaving me looking like a sock puppet (now I know who wrote “do your ears hang low?”)
*Where my skin tone is about as vibrant as a newspaper
*To achieve the youthful glow it now involves a stick of butter, the correct lighting, and touch of alcohol for the people I might be chatting with
*Where my “fun size” candy dependence has attached “woeful weight” rolls in places I was unaware of
*Forgetful is now the ninth dwarf…I mean eighth…oh crap I don’t remember
*My son says 40 is the new thirty but now that he has his drivers license his brown nosing is at a new high
I’m sure there is more but I have a brain cramp from exerting all this energy and I still have to go shopping for my mom jeans, hot rollers for my new hairdo, and get to Bingo- I think its my lucky night.
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